Hey,
I’ve been watching some of the perma-threads on ruby-talk and I
really think we need to establish some new mailing lists to handle
the various constant subjects that come up. I’m sure this list is
nowhere near complete, but here’s what I thought up:
-
ruby-jobs – We should make it even harder for people with money
to find people with skills. I know my book collection is rivaling
the Imelda Marcos shoe collection, so making it easier for me to buy
more books is dangerous. Head hunters should be relegated to the
ruby-doesnt-need-you mailing list, but don’t tell them their e-mail
is going there. They like telling their customers, “You should
reconsider using Ruby since I can’t seem to find anyone to fill your
position.” -
ruby-whynot – Every person has an opinion so why not just air it
out like a stinking possum carcass? This could cover a lot of
ground. Topics like, “Why not Python?”, “Why not Ruby::Inline?”,
“Why not Nitro?”, “Why not Rails Engines?” “Why not Macs?” “Why not
Intel?” “Why not a virtual machine?” “Why not Java?” “Why not
Sailor Moon styled bura-sera?” The potential is endless for this list. -
ruby-sellouts – I personally got no problem whoring myself out to
any company that pays my speaker’s fee, but some other folks might
need a place to confess their sins. This list would have to be
anonymous so that the posters could confess and not have their
confessions ruin their thriving Web 2.0 Ajax Tagging Todo List
Ferrari Payment Machines. Extra points if you can say one thing in
your blog to pimp your goods, and then in private insult your customers. -
ruby-rails-sheep – No, not a place for former Java sheep to come
and turn their brains off again, but rather a place for people to
discuss the constant topic of table pluralization. Is it a violation
of all laws of nature? Is it overhead for minimal benefit? Is it a
great way to show users ER diagrams? This is the place to chat it
all up. -
ruby-performance-haters – Ruby’s speed is the white elephant in
the room. We all know it’s there, sitting in the room knocking the
good china on the damn floor, but we just can’t talk about it because
if we do we’ll have to actually clean up the damn thing’s giant piles
of crap. Let’s blow the doors off this myth once and for all by
creating a list solely devoted to just complaining about Ruby’s speed
without doing much. Even better, let’s propose every solution
except writing a new virtual machine. -
ruby-only – Some people can’t stand any deviation from the
approved topics. Step outside the incredibly narrow vision their
obsessive compulsive brains have for the list and WHAM! No IRC for
you! The ruby-only list is for them. It would only allow messages
which are valid Ruby source with no deviation. If it isn’t able to
run in a special protected environment that has only core libraries–
or has any comments–then it’s immediately removed. Nobody wants to
waste their time on fluff crap like making friends, building
community, having fun, or discovering new ideas from off topic
discussions. Nope, it’s Ruby only 24/7. -
ruby-smartass – This list would basically just be me mouthing off
to people who end up doing better than me and make me jealous. I’d
write scathing reviews of their projects and insult them all since I
don’t like people anyway. I mean, I only donate my software to
people so that I can spread bugs. Anyway, I’m smarter and sexier
than the whole world so I need my own mailing list.
If you haven’t figured it out, this is a joke. Laugh, have a great
weekend, and don’t take things so seriously.
Zed A. Shaw
